Posted on June 07,2017 in Divorce

Regardless of what happened between you and your spouse, children are often the ones that suffer the most when it is time for a marriage to end. Despite your differences, forcing your children to choose between one parent or the other can create serious conflict that affects their relationships in the future. Divorce does not have to be messy, and you can minimize the damage if both you and your spouse are invested in mitigating the emotional harm to the children and to each other. Your children care about both their parents and do not want to see you suffer.

Choosing between parents

When parents fight and bad-mouth each other, children often feel as if they must choose which one to love the most. They also may feel as if they must bad-mouth one parent when they are with the other. Because they love you both, this can create serious conflict within them. As your children grow older and become more like you and your ex, hearing negative things about their parents becomes particularly damaging. Your children should never have to choose between loving one parent or the other.

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 Posted on June 06,2017 in Divorce

Since divorce rates began skyrocketing in the 1970s, relationship experts have been fascinated and puzzled by high divorce rates. Many have studied common factors shared by divorcing couples in hopes of identifying predictors. Elite Daily recently dove into the results of these studies and compiled a list of common divorce predictors. Maybe you are struggling in your marriage, or perhaps you've already headed down the path to divorce. If so, knowing the following information may help you work on improving your marriage or assist you in parting amicably:

1. Having an online relationship: Yes, dating someone online is cheating - even if you don't meet in person. If two people are emotionally involved, that means a relationship exists and a spouse can get hurt, and angry, and jealous. Additionally, spending too much time on social media in general has also been shown to increase divorce rates.

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 Posted on May 31,2017 in Divorce Mediation

Even if you want a divorce, ending a marriage is never an enjoyable process. There are several things you are likely worrying about, such as property division and child custody. Trying to figure these details out can cause your emotions to overwhelm you and lead to contention. If you want to experience the benefits of an amicable divorce, here are some guidelines for collaborating with your spouse throughout the mediation process.

1. Stop playing the blame game

Divorce can cause a significant amount of emotional distress, including anger, disappointment and resentment. If you are not careful, you might give in to the urge to dump the blame on your spouse through punishment or revenge. Instead, try to develop a clear understanding of all the causes that led to divorce, including any changes in life stages, mental illnesses or skill deficits that created the challenges.

2. Discover your own mistakes

When you take all the blame and resentment off your spouse, you can start identifying and rectifying your own mistakes. You should not allow the process to cause you immense guilt or shame. Instead, this can be a time to learn. Evaluate how you may have been inconsiderate and non-cooperative during your marriage. Consider whether you resorted to criticizing or withheld affection. Focusing on your issues and working through them can set you up for a happier life and healthier relationships in the future.

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 Posted on May 27,2017 in Child Custody Mediation

The Office of the Attorney General of Texas recommends co-parenting after a divorce to promote healthy relationships between the child and both parents. This strategy is also referred to as shared parenting and defined as "when both parents work together as a team to raise their children, even after the marriage or romantic relationship is over."

Most people do not know how to work together with someone with whom they have had so much conflict, but you can learn new communication skills. The more specific your parenting plan is, the less conflict there will be once it is approved by the court.

When you are creating a parenting plan, you ought to include these elements:

• Scheduling parenting timeon a normal week.
• Parenting time during holidays, vacations, birthdays, etc.
• How you will decide to make changes to the parenting plan, as the kids get older and have different needs.

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 Posted on May 08,2017 in Divorce Mediation

You and your spouse have agreed that your marriage relationship is over, and you are both ready to free each other from your legal and emotional bonds. However, taking the steps to get from there to the beginning of your new start in life may seem overwhelming. Since you do not want to battle it out in court, a mediator may be able to provide you with all the services you need.

A mediator can help you and your spouse with the practical aspects of the divorce, including filing the petition and completing paperwork. He or she may also be able to lessen any emotional trauma by providing you with a neutral, third-party perspective and offering dispute resolution services as you work on the property division agreement.

Preparation

You and your spouse will prepare for mediation by attending a consultation and learning what materials you must gather in order to prepare your agreement and file for divorce. You will need to provide information about the following:

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 Posted on March 28,2017 in Divorce

The process of ending a marriage is never fun. Whether you are amicable or angry throughout the process, most people experience negative effects of divorce on their emotional, mental and physical health. While you and your ex are focused on separating and perhaps making the divorce easier on children, you may not notice the physical effects that divorce can have on you.

1. Increased rates of chronic diseases

Research shows that those who have made it through a divorce intact are also more likely to develop chronic conditions, like diabetes and heart disease, and deal with mobility issues as they get older. Taking care of yourself both emotionally and physically during a divorce may keep your heart healthier, ensuring you live a long, happy life.

2. Weight loss or gain

People handle emotional situations differently, and some people turn to food in times of stress. Comfort foods can help to soothe your emotions. Or you may lose your appetite completely when you are emotional and stressed. Either way, drastic changes to your weight can take a toll on your mental health, your energy levels and your overall physical health.

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 Posted on March 24,2017 in Divorce

Even when you and your spouse are reaching an amicable divorce arrangement without the need for outside intervention, the division of assets involves a complex settlement of your joined household that requires legal help to make sure it is shepherded through the system. When you have financial issues with the division that you cannot resolve on your own, it can get even more expensive, because both sides often choose to access lawyers to resolve the issue, and the resulting legal and court fees can mount quickly.

Streamlining divorce costs

There are a variety of ways to make sure you keep your legal costs down during a divorce, but many of them do require the cooperation of both parties to work out. The Huffington Post suggests the following:

• Choose your lawyer carefully, with an eye on the costs for billable hours.

• Try to reach as much of an agreement as possible with your spouse.

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 Posted on March 22,2017 in Divorce

Divorce can take a toll on your physical health, your personal and professional relationships and your finances. The costs, effort and time you put into ending your marriage may seem overwhelming as you deal with the sad, anxious emotions you have about your future. As you manage the anxiety of moving forward without a partner, it is important that you are financially prepared to take on the world on your own. Doing the following will help you build a better foundation to start fresh after the end of a marriage.

Close joint accounts and open your own

This should be your first step when you are financially preparing for divorce. Close all joint accounts and split the money that is left. Open your own accounts in just your name to protect the money you have from a spouse who may be angry or make bad decisions. If you both remain on the account and one decides to clean it out, the other is left with nothing.

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 Posted on March 20,2017 in Divorce

Ending a marriage can have a lasting effect on everyone who loves you. Your parents, children and friends all lose something when you split with your spouse. Your first goal is to protect your children and watch out for your best interests, and divorces can quickly become heated and tense without the right approach. Rather than fight over the little things or deal with bitter, angry feelings during the divorce process, work to limit conflict in the following ways.

Improve communication with your ex

Good communication skills are vital to any transaction or relationship, and clear, concise communication ensures that you get what you need from the divorce. If you can speak to your ex without a confrontation, try to discuss things face to face with a mediator involved rather than rely on text and email. If you feel threatened when you are with your ex, you may need to address your concerns and interests in a direct, well-thought-out email.

Consider counseling while you adjust to co-parenting

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 Posted on March 17,2017 in Divorce

When your marriage ends and you have kids to think about, telling them can be done right or wrong. While you cannot control their reactions, you can make sure that you prepare them as much as possible for what is coming. Most children value stability and consistency, and they want to know that both parents still love them and that they are not at fault for the divorce. How you talk to your kids about divorce depends on their age and where they are developmentally.

0 to 5 years old

Kids who are 0 to 5 years old depend on caregivers for everything but lack the ability to understand their own feelings, anticipate the future or deal with complex events. Preschoolers may start to be a little independent, but cause and effect still eludes them. The world revolves around them, and they often have a hard time distinguishing between fantasy and reality. They are also limited in their ability to talk about their feelings.

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