How to resolve parenting time issues without conflict

 Posted on January 18, 2017 in Divorce

Divorce is often complicated when there are children involved, and it is not uncommon for parents in Texas to have differing ideas about parenting their kids. When those differences interfere with your ability to co-parent, you and the other parent should find ways to work together to bring about a solution in the most amicable way possible.

Work on communicating with each other

The sooner you start accepting that your relationship with your ex-spouse is different, the better. You and your former partner now must work together for the benefit of your kids, and communication is important. When you and your former spouse talk to each other, try not to involve your emotions.

Pay attention to what is said during each conversation, whether it is by phone, email or text, and try your best to avoid challenging everything that is said. Even if there are family issues that involve conflicts like your children getting in trouble at school or your kids displaying negative behavior, you and your former partner should learn to discuss things in a pleasant and productive manner.

Collaborate on solutions

When issues arise that involve your parenting time arrangement, do not be so quick to dismiss options. Working together to develop alternate solutions can keep conflicts to a minimum. For example, if your ex-partner informs you that she or he cannot keep the kids on her or his weekend because of a medical conflict and you have already made plans, do not act rashly and get upset about the situation. Medical issues are important, and it is easier for you to rework your plans so they include your kids. That way, the other parent can get the medical care she or he needs instead of creating issues that may cause future problems with your parenting schedule.

Work on consistency

You and the other parent should work on establishing consistency in both of your households. You should have similar household rules so your children know how they should act, and you should have a routine in place so you can create a schedule that meshes well with your lifestyles. You should include in this schedule how school and summer vacations, personal time, special events, holidays and your children's activities should be handled. Even with a carefully constructed schedule, you both should maintain some type of flexibility just in case things happen when alternative parenting time arrangements are needed.

No co-parenting situation is perfect, and conflicts may arise between separating spouses for many reasons. If you are having trouble reaching agreements with your soon-to-be ex-spouse regarding your children, you should speak with a mediator who can offer you guidance on the matter.